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When I went to pick up Scarlett today from daycare, the daycare provider told me that Scarlett got bit by C., one of her playdate friends who started this week at her daycare. C. is 3 months younger than Scarlett but he probably weighs 5 lbs. or more than she does. I wasn't too upset because 1) it's one of her friends, and 2) the other child doesn't really "know" any better, especially at this age. This isn't the first time she's been bitten (or shoved) though.
It's actually really interesting to watch Scarlett and her friends interact. They're only 1 1/2 years old but they are so distinct in their personalities! In watching, I've come to realize that Scarlett does fight over toys and will not think twice about grabbing someone else's toy that she likes, but she doesn't push, shove, bite, or hit. So she does instigate some of the "unfriendly" interactions but when she's "attacked", she just cries or stares and blinks her eyes, almost as if by surprise. She doesn't fight back. So here's the crux of it - IS it good for her to fight back? I think that it's a really nice disposition that she doesn't ever think about fighting back but on the other hand, I don't want her to be bullied, especially when she gets older. So I often ask myself, is it good to teach my child to fight back? I know what the right answer is here, but it's either bully or be bullied, right?
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Congrats on starting a blog! Simply starting is often one of the hardest things to do.
ReplyDeleteIsn't there a happy medium between bullying or being bullied? Like the idea of being able to hold your own?
How would you "teach" a 1.5 yr old to fight back even if you wanted to?
I think it's good to teach your child to not let others take advantage of you, but I'm not sure how to best implement that idea.